Your Official “I Hate Valentine’s Day” Playlist

Valentine’s day…whether you love it or hate it, it’s almost here. With this sometimes dreaded all-the-lovers holiday comes the terrible annoying sap on the radio, and I know some of you can’t stand this crap, and of course, others pine over it. So, let’s start with some heartbreaking melodies, shall we?

Airborne Toxic Event “Sometime Around Midnight”

This will always be at the top of my list, cutting deeper than any blade to the heart. This is for all of you who just can’t get over it. So you walk into a bar…and there’s your ex standing there…and all the feels come back. I’ve cried many many times to this song. Even when I had no reason to cry. It’s just fucking perfect. “And you’re too drunk to notice everyone is staring at you. You just have to see her, you just have to see her, you just have to see her, you know that she’ll break you in two.”

The Ting Tings “Day To Day”

Being pulled a part. People going their separate ways. Being played. Being strong. My favorite line rings loud and clear: “Everyday we mean it, respect it, put it out, neglect it, talk it through, face it, tear it up, replace it, win some, lose some, find out we use some, bend the rules and have fun, someone you can count on…”. It’s the perfect song to move on…

Everclear “So Much For The Afterglow”

One of my favorite throwbacks. It’s so good to put this on when nothing’s going right in your day, and things just seem too hard. It’s all in the sarcasm of the happy vocals that takes a turn for the angst. “We never ask ourselves the questions to the answers that nobody even wants to know…so much for the afterglow.”

Amanda Palmer “Another Year”

From the sparseness of the piano, you know it’s going to be a sad sad song. What closes a rather melancholy but amazingly bold album, “Another Year” is the anthem for lonely hearts. “I tried to fall in it again. My friends took bets and disappeared. I think I’ll wait another year…”

 Fiona Apple “Love Ridden”

Fiona Apple has this way of painting pictures through music and words. “I will look at you with the focus I gave to my birthday candles. I’ve wished on the lighted blue fames and baby I’ve wished for you. Nobody sees when you are lying in your bed and I want to crawl in with you but I cry instead. And in a little while we’ll only have to wave…” This is the song to sober up, be strong, and walk away from something causing you grief.

 Leona Lewis “Better In Time”

Maybe it’s because my first heartbreak happened when this song came out…or maybe it’s because it was on the radio 24/7, but this is a great song to rebuild your strength to. Be patient. It really will all get better in time.

 Queens Of The Stone Age “I Appear Missing”

This is the ascension into depression, that moment when you need to shut the world out and go into your shell. “I’ve gone missing, no longer exist. One day I hope I am someone you miss.” The song shines with acceptance at the end when Josh sings “I’ve never loved anything until I loved you. I’m over the edge what can I do. We’re falling through.”

Fiona Apple “Paper Bag”

“I was staring at the sky, just looking for a star to pray on or wish on…a daydream of a boy who’s reality I knew was a hopeless to be had…but then the dove of hope began its downward slope and I believed for a moment that my chances were approaching to be grabbed…but as it came down near so did a weary tear. I thought it was a bird but it was just a paper bag.” Heart. BREAK. Lost hope. “Hunger hurts but starving works…when it costs too much to love.” Can we say…jaded?

Coldplay “O”

When Chris sings, “fly on right through, maybe one day I’ll fly next to you, maybe one day I can fly with you…” I curl into a ball of tears. Those five lines are the epitome of yearning for someone who you have to let go and the burning of unconditional love you will have again but…when?

 Maroon 5 “Sweetest Goodbye”

From the beat to the vocals to the wailing guitars this is one of my top choices to fall asleep to. It makes me feel warm as I cry to sleep to it. “the rhythm of the rain that drops and coincides with the beating of my heart.” One last time he wishes to be with her. “There must be someplace that only you and I could go so I can show you how I feel…” cue guitar solo…

 The Antlers “Putting The Dog To Sleep” 

I don’t know what to say about this track other than…the metaphor is real.

Travis “The Humpty Dumpty Love Song”

One of the most overlooked heartbreak songs. A baby cries in the background. It’s simple. And direct. “All I need is you. I just need you. I’m gonna give my heart to you.” Even though this guy is absolutely wrecked…he’s going to love unconditionally.

 Coldplay “Ink”

Such a beautiful pop song to me. “Got a tattoo said ‘together through life’ and you wonder when you wake up will it be alright? feels like there’s something broken inside” This is the post-breakup song. “I’m lost whenever you go. I love you so much that it hurts.”

Fiona Apple “Valentine”

From the beating heart in the background to the cracks in her voice, this song is FRAGILE. “I made it to a dinner date. my teardrop seasoned every plate. I tried to dance but lost my nerve. I cramped up in the learning curve…” The song teeters on obsession with a declaration of childishness “I stand no chance of growing up. I root for you. I love you. you. you. you…”

Weezer “No Other One”

“my girl’s a liar but I stand beside her…” the first line of the song. “All of the drugs she does scares me real good…nobody knows me like her, nobody knows her like me…” Obviously this is one sided. Cheeky, obsessive, and over the top in every way. One of their most underrated tracks.

 Mike Pinto “It Ain’t Easy”

Denial. We’ve all had it. And we’ve all felt what’s real. This is a ‘it’s not over yet because I still feel for you and I know what I felt and I know that it was real…wasn’t it?’ kind of song. And it’s a great song to send you off to.

To dive into your down-with-cupid playlist, click here.


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