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25 Reasons Why We’ll Forever Praise ‘Sister Act’

Gird all of the halos and habits and get ready to relive all of the Mother Superior shade you still heave all over the place (of course, there’s never enough, thank you Maggie Smith), because everyone’s favorite movie in the whole entire world, Sister Act, is celebrating twenty-five years of makin’ fabulous music for our oh, so sinful lives.

So, to celebrate such a heavenly occasion (it really is, right Sister Mary Patrick?), Philly Mixtape is serving up a special commemorative piece that’s spillng all sorts of Ms. Whoopi tea and then some, while gettin’ down with all of that spiritual music truth and exposing the real Sister Mary Robert

No shade, Ms. Wendy Makkena, no shade. 

It’s all here and so, so much more, so let’s all kneel down and commune our asses to Sister Act church right now. Because after twenty-five glory-us years…..it’s still truly the only way. 

1.Go on, Mizz Whoopi….  All tea, no shade to the Divine Ms. Bette Midler, but we’re so god, um, darn glad she turned down the lead role of lounge singer-turned-nun-turned-famous gospel diva Dolores Van Cartier/Sister Mary Clarence. Truly, there’s just no one else that could fill that halo, that sass and those stilettos quite like Ms. Whoopi. And John, Peter, Paul and Ringo, of course. 

2.”Good night, ladies and gentlemen…you don’t give a shit.” Actually, we give lots of shits about the opening credits of Sister Act because it not only kicks it all off, but we’re blessed with the fabulous “Lounge Medley” (hey there, Ronelles!) that every true fan of the movie absolutely knows by heart….with all of those moves, of course. #burnin 

3.”Say goodnight, Ernie”   Oh, Ernie…we hardly knew ye. Really, he may have made a couple of wrong turns in his life, but, sigh…..

4.Go on, Mr. Harvey Keitel…  The original gangsta. No further witnesses. 

5.And of course, purple mink coats from your lover’s ex-wife are a must….  It’s ours, we deserve it. Connie LaRocca 4 Eva….

6.It’s where all of the fabulous queens learned how to throw proper shade…   Thank you, Maggie Smith, aka Mother “Boogie Woogie on the Piano” Superior. And of course, gurl groups 4 lyfe. 

7.Lesson number one….  #younuns 

8.”Gravy” and Ms. Kathy all day… And more of Ms. Kathy Najimy serving up the fierce with every god damn (sorry, you just have to) line she delivered along with every single scene she stole as delightfully overjoyed Sister Mary Patrick. 

9.Long live Sister Mary Robert…well, sort of…   While it’s a known tea spill that Sister Mary Robert’s vocals were actually served up by the lovely Ms. Andrea Robinson, you have to hand it to Ms. Wendy Makkena…no one takes a dive out a moving car quite like she can. Now, get out of bed, you daisy head and get to watchin’ Sister Act for the fifth time today. 

10.The first choir class…..  No explanation needed. 

11.”Just a Touch of Love”   Is truly all we need. And to watch the C+C Music Factory blessed montage over and over and over again. Ready, set, Double Dutch. 

12.And again…..  

13.”Hail Holy Queen” Or should we say, Hail, Holy Yaaaaas Kween whenever this delightful takes over our Showtunes Sundays lives. That answer would be yas….kween. Now, step. 

14.”My God”  Sing along if you know the words. That would be…everybody. 

15.”Roll With Me Henry”  We’ll be rollin straight to the juke box and over to the dance floor whenever Ms. Etta James’ “Henry” enters over our old school music lives. In which fans of Sister Act know that it’s pretty much..everyday. Let’s roll. 

16.”It’s better than sex”   Or, so we’ve heard….

17.”If My Sister’s in Trouble”  While no one has truly any idea just whatever happened to Lady Soul (and that definitely-from-’92 wardrobe), Sister Act’s R&B blessed theme song and nun worthy accompanying video will cement the truth that it’s really just…that…movie. Praise ’em up for the ladies of Lady Soul. 

18.”Rescue Me”   If you haven’t done your chores while grooving along to Fontella Bass’ smash hit, then you definitely missed, like, all of the spots. 

19. Sister Act 2:Back in the Habit  No explanation needed as you most likely know every bit of the sequel just as well as you know its predecessor. And the moment Ms. Lauryn Hill takes over our ‘Habit’ lives with “His Eye is on the Sparrow”….still pure heavenly bliss. 

20. Sister Act:The Musical   Another no explanation needed as you most likely, well, you know where this is going you fabulous Broadway kween, you. 

21.One more time…. 

22.”I Will Follow Him” Sigh……

23.The closing credits, though…..   You know you make me wanna…..watch them over and over again. Dolores Van Cartier on the cover of People magazine for life. 

24.San Francisco Luv…  The true star of the show here…the flawless and captivating city of San Francisco, for which nun of these classic Sister Act shenanigans would truly exist. Or without Buckwheat Bertha, of course. We simply can’t leave her out now, can we? 

25.Do you really need another reason? If so, there’s two words for you….Bless You. And then start it all over again. In a word, thank you Sister Act…thank you. 

 

 

 

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8 Albums Celebrating Milestones in 2017/Those 2002 Albums, Though..

So, why eight albums on this week’s list? Read on to find out and relive those 2002 albums, though…because you most certainly will. 

Ashanti/Self-titled Let’s just get right down to business, because when it comes to the music of 2002, Ms. Ashanti was that business. Fresh off the hook from Ja Rule’s (ahem..)chart topping “Always on Time,” the diva served us life with the Marley Marl/Biggie sampling lead single, “Foolish,” (plus that Goodfellas inspired video, though) which spent an unprecedented eleven weeks on top of the Billboard Hot 100

Of course, it didn’t hurt that the former Princess of Murder Inc Records/Hip Hop & R&B was featured on, like, forty-five tracks that year(“What’s Luv?” “Down 4 U”…sigh), but it was this album and all of the pre-Ciara goodies that were laced all over it (“Happy,” “Baby”) that further proved that when it came to those grooves of 2002, Ms. Ashanti was always on time for all of us. 

Norah Jones/Come Away With Me Long before Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga gave us Cheek to Cheek realness and a touch before Xtina went all Back to Basics, Ms. Norah Jones served us with the lighter side of jazz with her whimsical debut set, Come Away With Me

While every song on the album still remains as light as a sun-kissed breeze (the title track, “Don’t Know Why“) the album itself was a straight up beast on the charts where it would go on to sell a whopping twenty million copies worldwide and continue with Grammy snatch (six for our girl) that still remains in a historical class of its very own. Although Ms. Jones doesn’t own our adult contemporary hearts these days like she used to, the magical music memories on her stellar debut will certainly last a lifetime. 

Nelly/Nellyville In 2000, the Band Aid promoting rapper made us learn that down home Country Grammar. (“Ride Wit Me” 4 lyfe). In 2002, he had us take off all of our clothes because he made it so f#$king “Hot in Herre” for all of us, which was soon followed by a romp on the Desperate Housewives set with Kelly Rowland in the “Dilemma” video.

There was a shoe or a song or something called “Air Force Ones,” which proves that if we were a tossed a one-way ticket to Nellyville right this very second, we would do it all over again, even the Country Grammar era for that matter. Right, Ms. Vanna? Let’s go. 

J.Lo/J to Tha L-O The Remixes/This is Me…Then While could easily spill about how 2002 was also the year that gave us….Bennifer, there’s just not enough words on the page for all of that. Especially since ’02 was also the year that Ms. Lo gave us not one, but two blockbuster records, the first being The Remixes album (“Ain’t it Funny” all day), which was followed a touch later down the road with the release of her third studio album, This Is Me…Then.

Yes, “Jenny From the Block” and “Dear Ben” are still the worst, but we’ll forever be grateful for the L.L. co-starring and (and Deborah Laws Very Special” sampling), “All I Have,” the Flashdance inspired clip for “I’m Glad” will always do it to us and the “Juicy Fruit” tasting, “Loving You” will always be quite delicious.

Because it was both of these albums that truly turned J.Lo from being a diva into being that diva. And we’ll never forget it. 

Missy Elliot/Under Construction Oh, Missy try to maintain…our lives when it comes to the funky fresh flavors on your still red-hot fourth studio album. Without going on and on here (because..this record), you must dive in at once and relive this glorious 2002 music moment, because there’s simply no flippin’ and reversin’ it when it comes to the Missy truth that will always be served up on her Grammy owning, career defining album, Under Construction. 

Christina Aguilera/Stripped Here…we…f#$king go, right, that now oh, so infamous Rolling Stone cover that truly served us Xtina realness when it came to this album? Gone were the Mickey Mouse ears and Britney comparisons, and waaaay in was Linda Perry, assless chaps, more Lil’ Kim, one “Beautiful” ballad and one “Dirrty” video that will forever remain in a delightfully skanky class all on its own accord. 

While we may never know when–or even if–Mizz Xtina will get up out of her chair on The Voice and serve us with Blonde (or whatever it was supposed to be called), but Stripped certainly gave every Xtina queen an album for days (sorry, Back to Basics), especially when it comes to album cut, “Get Mine, Get Yours,” which pretty much sums this era of the window destroying diva all sorts of up.

Well, that and the Justified & Stripped tour, of course.

Justin Timberlake/Justified One word..”Britney” followed by five more words…”Cry Me a River Video”….do you really need anything else? How about, everything else on the album that started the still ignited JT era, including “Like I Love You,” “Rock Your Body,” and of course, “Señorita.” Ay dios mio, Mr. Timberlake. 

8 Mile Soundtrack Eminem….the dearly departed Brittany MurphyKim Basinger…”Lose Yourself”….no further questions if you dare to ask any when it comes to this soundtrack

 

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Groove of the Day/Missy Elliot/”Pass That Dutch”

Yas, Lindsay….it’s Monday again. However, today is more than special than VSOP because we’re celebrating an unofficial, yet, oh, so official national holiday called…Mean Girls Day. 

For those that might not know (if you don’t know, God, Karen, you’re so stupid), October 3rd is the date of all dates because it’s the moment in the movie when Lindsay’s Lohan’s Katie–oh, wait, it’s Cady–finally talks to Aaron for the very first time before he becomes her property. While we may never know why the banks, schools and the post office don’t close for this cherished holiday, what we can do is remember a film (hey, Ms. Fey..and thank you for life) that remains as fresh as the day it was rightfully served to us (although the Burn Book seems a bit outdated at this point) and still has us wearing pink on Wednesdays. 

Of course, one of the many, many, many reasons why we’re still, like, so obsessed with Mean Girls over a decade later (here’s a whole bunch more, Ms. Wieners) is because of its bitchin’ soundtrack, which still plays out like a fetch mixtape featuring a buffet of music artists ranging from Peaches, Blondie, Pink, Kelis and one Mathletes rap that we’re still trying to figure out as to why the limit does not exist. 

But if there’s one song from MG that we must show our Janice and Damian love to today, it’s Missy Elliot’s classic ’03 banger, “Pass That Dutch.” For one, you always respect Ms. Elliot, and two, the song passes it to the left right at the time when we’re first welcomed into the wonderful world of The Plastics. But even better is that Missy’s monster groove pops up a bit later when Cady is permanently invited to sit with Regina, Gretchen, Karen and Regina’s Mom (because the girls keep her so young) at the lunch table. 

So, while we’re still waiting for our invitation, let’s pop that, pop that and jiggle that fat because today’s the day to bake that cake filled with rainbows and smiles so we can all eat a piece and be f#$king happy. 

Now, dance, you Spring Fling queen. I’m talking to you, Emma Gerber. 

Cover photo courtesy of www.thoughtcatalog.com